I don't wonder with you

My guy is so amazing. I have known him for such a short time, and I really do trust him completely. That is a lot to say, and he is a salesman, so he is a smooth talker and that does scare me a lot sometimes. I don't want to get emotionally invested and then have him turn out to be one of those guys who says what ever he wants to get a girl attached so he can have his way and then walk away unbruised. That was how Brad was, and seeing the same symptoms in Chris I was sure to keep a good solid obvious distance from him and let him know his romance was lost on me, I was immune to his bullshit. That was a good call, butthis seems different, and I have met the family, and we did wait to have sex until I knew him better. I know a week isn't very long, but it was for us, we were inseperable for the first 6 days we met and it felt like I had known him forever. He likes to be around the girl he loves every day, and that is good news. A self proclaimed hopeless romantic, and falls fast. I guess I do to, this all sort of came out of no where. I'm ready to be in a secure and uncomplicated relationship, and this could be it. There is not much to worry about and we're just happy together, no fights, nothing to fight about. So far so very very good. We talked on the phone for 3 hours straight last night.

Warren saw the pictures on my facebook or myspace not sure which, but he texted me like 2 minutes after I had posted them. He asked who is the new guy in all your pics? I didn't know what to call us quite yet because we aren't officially together. I guess it's because we are trying to slow things down but Eric says it's because he wants me to decide if I really want to be committed right now. I am pretty sure I don't want to be with anyone else right now, and I'm ready for a committment, but I am waiting until I get back to give him that answer. So I just told warren its a new fling.... he Texted me later saying so I guess that leaves us back to nothing then? I didn't know what to say, if I should just cut allties with him right here, and just say yes I guess so. Or no it isn't like that. But both is just wrong. I can't just push warren out of my life because he is a friend and doesn't deserve that with out some kind of explination. But I don't want to lead him on and keep him on a back burner becuase I want to be committed and fully committed when I see Eric again. So I didn't write back for a while, then I decided it was best to be reasonable and not fight. I wrote this, "What were we before then? We weren't dating although it was a possibility, we weren't. We were friends though and I hold that in much higher regard than nothing. I hope we can remain friends and if you want to talk about this please call me." It was the right thing to say and it was exactly how I feel with out letting myself get carried away one way or the other. He texted me back and I got it this morning, "you're right I do cherish our friendship too. I think it just caught me by surprise cuz i still have feelings for you. I'm sorry i over reacted i will try to give... " didn't get the rest of that text, might get it later? Anyways its a good way to end it without being mean or selfish, and then if eric turns out to be another brad I will still have a good friend in warren, something that is really important to me.


today is kind of overcast and cloudy, but wasn't planning on doing much anyways, might try and get ahold of steve, or something. I avoided seans calls because I don't even want to go there, I knw I would be good if I saw him but I don't even want to put myself in that situation because I really reallly don't want to fuck things up with eric.

me and kristin got to hang out a little bit yesterday and today we will get together too hopefully and hit camp tomorrow. maybe it will be sunny. :)she's the only friend I've seen here so far, and i'm cool with that. I really should call steve though and try and meet up with him sometime today cuz he was really sweet about trying to be available to make plans while i'm up in maine.